1. What Does Compassion Accomplish?

In our very first episode, Becca, Chris and Cory talk about what we would like to accomplish with What Compassion Accomplishes.  We will be talking about how we can help break the cycle of domestic abuse and sexual violence in our communities and the importance of conversation and education. 

If you or someone you care about have experienced domestic, dating or sexual violence please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or one of the WCA's 24-hour hotlines at 208-343-7025 or 208-345-7273.

Follow us on social media!
@wca_boise

For more information and resources, check out these websites!
wcaboise.org
lovisrespect.org

Contact us at outreach@wcaboise.org!

Transcript

Unknown: 0:01

Welcome to what compassion accomplishes a podcast dedicated to sharing information, ideas and resources about domestic abuse and sexual assault. The topics discussed in this podcast, including survivor stories, supportive services, and domestic abuse or sexual violence can be difficult, and we urge you to listen with care. Our hosts are not licensed counselors or mental health professionals. If you or someone you care about have experienced domestic dating, or sexual violence, please call the WCA 24 hour hotline at 208-343-7025 or the National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233. You can also find more resources in the description of this podcast.

Cory Mikhals: 0:52

Hi, I am Cory Mikhals and this is what compassion accomplishes today, our very first podcast. I'm honored to have in the studio with us here Chris Davis, the WCA communication manager and Becca Maguire, WCA outreach specialist. Hello.

Becca Maguire: 1:09

Hi, how are you?

Chris Davis: 1:11

Hi, Cory.

Cory Mikhals: 1:12

I am wonderful and honored to be able to be a part of this. And really this first podcast was just to let everyone know what we're trying to accomplish with what compassion accomplishes.

Chris Davis: 1:26

So what compassion accomplishes is going to encompass really anything having to do with domestic abuse, sexual assault, child abuse, supportive services, survivor stories, how to support a friend, things people are doing in the community to support community based services, education, you know, what abuse is, what abuse isn't mythbusting. So really everything. We're going to talk about everything Cory, I hope you're ready for this, it's gonna be a wild fun ride.

Cory Mikhals: 2:01

I'm I'm ready. And I and we do want everyone to know that at times, there is going to be topics that are not going to be comfortable. They're not going to feel good. But the point of all of this is not to scare anyone, it's not to trouble anyone. It is to give the tools and to share the experiences so that we can take away these horrific stories in the future. That is what we all want is to get to a world. And a day, when domestic abuse is not something we have to worry about. Unfortunately, we're not there today.

Chris Davis: 2:41

We're not. But we believe and I think I'll Becca speak on this too. But it It changed. Change starts with each one of us each and every day. And that's what we we go to work at that WCA we we do outreach and prevention work and marketing, communications and social media. And, you know, we think if we plant the seed with just one person, just one person, we've done something. And so if you start one conversation, if one person learns something, if they're, if they're prompted to take action, to start a conversation to reach out to someone, then we've made an impact. And that's what it's really about is changing communities by by just impacting one person starting a conversation. And that's what Becca does, as our outreach specialist, she she goes out into the community. And the last year, you know, with a pandemic, it's really been a lot of virtual work. And really switching gears completely. And so Becca a lot of your work has been doing what? Share with us about how you're you're working to change community. Virtually.

Becca Maguire: 3:46

Yeah, so we've totally had to change gears over the past year. Now. It has been almost a year since we were at our stay at home order. And we immediately jumped into how do we get this information out to people, what, what can we say to let people know that we are here. So we have done, we've created different digital toolkits that have all of our presentations available. We've switched gears with our social media, how we present on there, we've had live at lunch just to let anyone who needs to hear our message. Let them know that we are here. Our doors are open, we're here to help and we've we've just really had to engage on a digital platform because we can't see people we can't be there in public in person at different events. I mean community events are a huge part of my job and not being able to go out and and talk to people has been difficult but I think that our change of pace and where we ended up going with this. I think we have really had an impact on on the work that we are doing and we are getting our message out that we are we are here.

Cory Mikhals: 4:54

Right and that's so important because for so many people, women, children, men, it, when you're in that situation of abuse, whether it is verbal abuse, physical abuse, and we'll be talking a lot about the differences there. And as Chris had mentioned, what is abuse and what isn't. So we'll be talking about that a lot. But when someone is in that situation, it's so easy to feel alone. And that is, that's the worst place to be, is to feel alone, no one can possibly understand what you're going through. No one's been through it before no one is experiencing it the way you experience it. And so you isolate yourself, and try and numb in whatever way the pain that you're going through and justify why it happens. As opposed to knowing you're not alone, knowing there's help people that care, like the WCA. There, there is help. And no matter how scary it is, yeah,

Chris Davis: 6:12

There's hope. There's hope. And that's, that's one of the big things with this podcast is that we, we want to educate, we want to educate people about services, like the WCA because there are our organizations like ours, throughout the country, and, and throughout the, not all over the world. But in a lot of places throughout the world. There are community based organizations, you know, you can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline, you could even call our 24 hour hotline and, and get connected to resources elsewhere. But there are community based organizations, but there are people who care in your life. And so we want to help people know how to reach out and support one another. We want to help people recognize signs that something might be going on. We want to help people support, learn how to support people in the best healthy ways, by concentrating on them and not, you know, putting down on abuser, so focusing on, you know, being constructive and letting people know that you care about them. By continuing to reach out we want to, we want to help people understand the dynamics of those things, right. I mean, there's there's so much that we want to accomplish with this podcast, because it's about what compassion accomplishes. So we will be talking about, you know, the dangers of victim blaming, and trauma. And we'll also be talking about the amazing people in our community and how they support our clients, and what a gift card can do to empower and give somebody back their freedom. And, you know, the amazing survivor stories and how people the resilience of people. And you know, those are few good stories, too. So there are bright, wonderful things, and those can help me make people feel good.

Cory Mikhals: 8:01

Well, and and I hope everyone takes out of the podcast, this that yes, as we mentioned early on, there are going to be disturbing stories, there's going to be disturbing topics. But at the end of each and every one of those, what I hope you get out of this is hope that at the end of those tragic stories, those survivor stories, yeah, it was, it was horrific, and in situations that no one no one should ever have to endure. They did it. They made it through to the other side and with the help of the WCA with organizations that are in our community to be able to help and to guide you and to show you that there is light on the other side. When you talk to these survivors about that other side, just seeing that joy, that going from tragedy to joy and that life is so much more than what they were experiencing enduring and accepting in a lot of cases in their life. Now Becca for if someone right now is in the situation. They're they're dealing with domestic abuse, controlling partner, whatever that happens to be. Even though you know, yes, things are getting a little bit better with mandates and whatever. But they're still always been the doors open to be able to help. So even with the shutdown, WCA is still here.

Becca Maguire: 9:42

Oh yeah, we were always here. One of the first things that you can do when you're ready is to call our 24 hour hotlines. We have amazing trained personnel that will answer your call. They will give you the resources that you need. They'll answer any questions that you have, any concerns, anything like that, they are there for you. And so I think it's just really important to when you know, someone, it could be you, it could be someone that you know, that hotline is available for you.

Chris Davis: 10:11

you can also visit our website at wcaboise.org. Those numbers are there. And you can get also lots of information in educational. And we want to make sure that everybody knows that this happens to men and women, and people in all kinds of relationships, all kinds of intimate partner relationships. It could be familial relationship, you don't have to be living with that partner anymore. The most dangerous time is when someone to actually makes that decision to leave. So just know you can call our hotline from anywhere, anytime, you can also call the National Domestic Violence Hotline. We want people to listen to this podcast, and get educated and get connected to resources and help the community we're gonna have some great guests. We are gonna have survivor stories, but we're gonna have some great guests from the community, our friends, in healthcare, our friends in law enforcement, our friends from our staff, we are working to bring the community together. And so we can move forward not only out of this pandemic, but out of this pandemic, that's known as domestic violence. Because it has been a pandemic, within the pandemic, it has gotten worse, but it is a healthcare pandemic.

Cory Mikhals: 11:19

Well, one of the I mean, with the pandemic and with the stay at home order. And I can only imagine that, you know, you're sometimes going to work going to school, is your chance to get away from whatever the abusive situation is, when people have then been forced to stay at home with whoever is the abuser, it has to just compounded. The the problem that is out there, really, and so just just know, we're here, we're here, we're in this together, and there is hope, reach out.

Chris Davis: 12:01

you are not alone.

Cory Mikhals: 12:02

And if you're a friend of someone, that that you feel, maybe is going through that, but they're still in that denial of trying to, to hide it, because that's another thing is I don't want the world to know what I'm going through. And so even your best friend might not be completely honest with what he or she or they're going through. So look for those signs, what are what are some of the signs as a friend that you should look for if you start to have those concerns.

Becca Maguire: 12:35

So one of the biggest signs that I think people can recognize is isolation. So social abuse in itself is a huge warning sign a huge red flag, someone's partner, someone's family member, isolating them from seeing their close friends, or not allowing them to go out and especially with this pandemic, using COVID as a fear tactic of"Oh, like, I don't want you to go out. Like you have to stay home with me like I'm the only one that can keep you safe. Right?" I think that that isolation tactic is a huge, it's a very big red flag warning sign that I think, is very easy to tell because you are in contact with someone all the time and and now you're not. And I think just being able to even if you haven't heard from them for a while, just reach out to them, email them, write them snail mail, snail mail has been a huge people writing letters to each other. So I think that's a big thing, text them, it doesn't even have to be "Hey, how are you?" just, "Hey, I saw this picture the other day, and I thought of you. How are you?" So just small little things like that.

Cory Mikhals: 13:45

Just let them know you are there for them. And for you as the friend or family member, whatever the case. You can call the WCA or the national abuse hotline as well. And be able to get some more things to look for and some tips and things to be able to reach out, let that person know you love them. You care about them. You're there for them. And then you hope, and it's a whole lot of hoping and praying at that point.

Becca Maguire: 14:19

It really is. And I think that being patient also it can be a little difficult. Being a friend or support to someone and seeing someone go through this. You have to be patient with them. They're someone's if they're not ready to leave a situation. They're not ready to leave and and the threat of leaving could be very real to them. So just being patient with with your friend, family member, anyone that you think could be in a situation.

Cory Mikhals: 14:49

Well, we have a lot of topics we're going to be going over. We want to let you know where we are, what we're doing, and what to expect with what compassion accomplishes. The biggest thing right now to know is you're not alone. And there is hope. No one ever, ever deserves to be abused in any fashion. So that's the one thing to always keep in mind. And I hope you can join us. There's all the information phone numbers website, and we look forward to hearing from you and, and talking about some of the wonderful stories that are out there that show you all the hope that we're talking about. This is what compassion accomplishes.

Unknown: 15:34

Thank you for listening to this episode of what compassion accomplishes. Again, if you or someone you know has experienced domestic abuse, dating or sexual violence, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or the WC A's 24 hour hotline 208-343-7025